Yu Yu Hakusho Jobs
by Zouri
Summary: When Yuskue and friends have a job, nothing good can come of it.


A/N: My second When Anime characters get Jobs story. This one has a little more of an action focus, but it is still pretty funny at some points. I hope you like it like the first one. Oh, and I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho.  
  
When Anime characters get Jobs  
Yu Yu Hakusho  
  
Yuskue sat at the edge of a room in a chair, with little kids around him. They were all asking him questions, but since they all spoke together no one could understand them. Sitting there, Yuskue paid them no attention. He looked across the room, watching Keiko as she sat down, with kids all around her, while telling them a story. He frowned, thinking about how he got himself into this mess.  
  
"Please Yuskue" Keiko pleaded; "I'm going to need more help watching the kids at the day care center." Yuskue simply looked away and stated "You can forget that Keiko, no way I'm gonna waste my weekend watching some brats." Keiko frowned, and then she looked in her backpack and pulled something out. "Well what if you were going to get paid." "Give it up Keiko, I'm not gonna do it, and that's final" Yuskue replied, still looking away. "Well I guess you don't want this ticket" Keiko said slyly. "Ticket for what" Yuskue asked, now interested in what she had to say. Keiko smiled, she knew she had him right where she wanted him. "There tickets to the Tokyo Dome." "Why didn't you tell me you had tickets to the Tokyo Dome, I've been trying to get those for weeks" he shouted. "Well" she replied "My parents got you a ticket so you could come too." "Well then what are we waiting for, lets go watch those little punks!"  
  
"Figures I'd go and do something like that for tickets" he mumbled under his breath. "Well, at least I'm not alone" he thought looking over at Kuwabara who was talking to one of the little kids. Bending down, Kuwabara asked him, "So what's your name little boy?" The kid lifted up his hind and smacked him across the face. Kuwabara stood up yelling "OOW! What was that for?" The kid then walked over to him and kicked him in the shin. "OOWWWW! All right that's it." Energy formed in Kuwabara's hand, taking the form of a sword. He grasped it, swinging it around, yelling "SPIRIT SWORD." He pointed it at the kid, saying "Now I'm gonna beat you so bad, not even kittens will play with ya." Another kid in diapers jumped up into his face. Kuwabara let go of his spirit sword, making it disappear as he yelled "AAAAHHHHH! GET HIM OFF! HE STINKS, HE STINKS!" The kid who hit him jumped and tackled Kuwabara, knocking him to the ground. Kuwabara knocked the kid off his face in time to see a bunch of little kids crawling over him. "Urameshi, help me" he screamed, but then the kids covered him.  
  
"Poor Kuwabara" Yuskue said. Then, there was a knock at the door. "I'll get it" Keiko said as she ran to the door with little kids trailing behind her. "Hello" she said in a cherry tone. "Oh, it's you." Yuskue looked over to her. "Yuskue, some friends of yours are here" she said walking out of the doorway. Standing out on the porch was none other that, Hiei and Kurama. Shocked, Yuskue asked "What are you two doing here?" "Koenma said there were some demons around here, but said we have to help you until we find them." Kurama simply nodded. Hiei unsheathes his sword, "But if even one of these brats looks at me funny then I'll kill em." Kurama makes him put the sword away. "Hmmm."  
  
Hiei stood in the corner of the room. It had been an hour since he first arrived. A little kid walked over to him and tugged on his pants asking "Mister, Mister, will you play with me?" "Why not play with Urameshi over there" Hiei said gruffly. The little kid looked to Yuskue, who had several children on his back. "Horsey, Horsey" the kid screamed as he tugged on Yuskue's hair. Angry, Yuskue prepared to throw the kid off saying "Ow! That hurts damn it", but Keiko stopped him by saying "Yuskue! You can't swear in front of kids, now get back to playing horsey. You do want your ticket, don't you?" Yuskue bent back down muttering "Must go to Tokyo Dome." The little kid pulled at his hair tighter. "Must see battle match."  
  
Hiei sighed, "All that just for some tickets. I just don't understand you spirit detective." Another kid pulled at Hiei's pants leg and asked "Will you read me a story?" "Kid, your really testing my patience", was his only reply. Suddenly, ice cream fell on his shirt. He looked up, only to have ice cream fall in his right eye. Upstairs was a kid with a dripping ice cream cone. "Sorry Mister" he said apologetically. "THAT'S IT" he screamed as he unsheathed his sword and jumped into the air, starring at the kid. "NOW YOU DIE!" "Rose Whip" came a voice, as a whip with thorns came from the kitchen and knocked the sword out of Hiei's hand. Hitting the floor, Kurama walked up and picked up the sword saying "Sorry Hiei, but I'll have to hang on to this." Hiei landed on the floor "Hmmm, I'll be sure to get you for this Kurama." Once again, ice cream hit Hiei, this time on his shirt.  
  
Kuwabara got up off the floor. Rubbing his head he thought "Man, that hurt." He looked round, regaining his bearings, when his cat Echiki walked outside. He thought "Why is Echiki outside" until he remembered his sister told him to make him an outside cat or that he would make good violin strings. "Echiki" he screamed as he ran out the door. The cat looked at him and tried to run, but was grabbed and hugged by Kuwabara. Kuwabara happily said "Oh Echiki, I've missed you." The cat scratched at him screaming "MEOW MEOW", which meant, "AAAAAAAA! LET GO, LET GO", but Kuwabara didn't seem to mind. Finally, the cat scratched at his eyes, making him release Echiki, and cover his eyes. Then, Echiki ran for his life.  
  
Kuwabara stumbled over furniture, still covering his eyes, screaming "Echiki, Echiki, where are you?" He then fell to the floor, and when he managed to open his eyes, he saw the kid that hit him standing right in front of him. The kid was standing there, starring at him while playing with his yo-yo. "Oh it's you" Kuwabara said, jumping to his feet. Once again, energy formed in his hand, taking the form of a sword. He grasped it, swinging it around yelling "SPIRIT SWORD." He pointed it at the kid saying "This time your not gonna get me, cause I got a little trick for you." Then, energy formed in his other hand and he grasped it, yelling "SPIRIT SWORD DOUBLE." "Now how is that" he said. The kid threw the yo-yo in his face, hitting him. Kuwabara dropped his spirit swords, causing them to disappear, so he could cover his face. Quickly, the kid tackled him again, making Kuwabara fall to the ground. When he opened his eyes, he was tied up with a jump rope. "HEY" he screamed, but the kid just hit him in the face with the yo-yo.  
  
Hiei walked from the hallway and saw the kid torturing Kuwabara. Kuwabara looked up and saw him. "Hiei, you gotta help me" he started to say but then the kid hit him with the yo-yo. "Kid, how did you do this" Hiei asked. "Why you want some too" the boy said. Shocked, Kuwabara said "You can talk?" "Shut up" the kid said, throwing the yo-yo into his face. Hiei smiled, "What's your name kid?" "Hien" he replied. "Well Hien, you wanna go have some real fun?" "Ok" he said. They started to leave, but he ran back, hit Kuwabara, and ran out the door. "That's my boy" Hiei said, walking out the door.  
  
Keiko was sitting in a chair with little kids all around her, cradling Poo in her arms. "Hey can I see him" a young girl asked. "Why sure" she responded "But please be careful with him." She gave Poo to the girl and she cradled him in her arms. Just then, a little boy ran up and smacked Poo out of her arms. "Hey don't do that" Keiko screamed as she tried to grab him, but the kid got to him first and kicked him into the wall. Poo hit the floor, got up, and began pecking at the boy. The boy batted at him, but keep missing. Lucky for him, he got a hit on Poo and was able to throw him into the wall again. This knocked Poo out.  
  
Keiko picked up Poo and tried to wake him up, unfortunately for her, she was unable to. "Oh man" she thought "I wonder if Yuskue is ok after that?" She looked into the other room to see Yuskue, unconscious on the floor, with three little kids around him. After a long silence, one of the little ones spoke up "Do you think he is dead?" "I don't know" another one of them said "He just collapsed." Keiko left back to the kitchen thinking "He'll be ok." "Lets jump on him" the third one shouted, and together they began to hop on top of Urameshi's back.  
  
Kurama, who had been changing diapers the whole time, came down from upstairs. He sighed, "Man, that can be hard work." He saw Hiei and Hien come in through the front door. "Did you see those humans run when I had become a full demon." "Yea, and how I had beat that police officer with that bamboo stick." "Yea, you got some real skills kid." "Thanks" the boy replied. Kurama noticed something about the kid that was different. "Hiei" Kurama said "Can I speak with you?" "Sure, hold on kid."  
  
"Hiei did you notice something different about that boy" Kurama asked. "Yea, he is a demon" Hiei stated. "That might be the demon we are after" Kurama said. "He is just a child" Hiei retorted "What damage could he do?" "He said himself he beat a police officer." "He only beat one. I had to beat the rest." 'We can't risk it" Kurama said. Hiei stood silently. "We have to work with Yuskue" Kurama reminded him. "Fine" Hiei said. "Good, let's go." "And I was starting to like that kid" Hiei thought. Kuwabara had gotten out of the jump rope and Yuskue was regaining consciousness as Hiei and Kurama entered the room. "Boy, we know your a demon" Kurama said. Hien looked over to them. Yuskue looked at Kurama and asked "Are you sure he is a demon?" Hien quickly jumped high into the air and reverted back to his true form. He had pale skin, with long red hair. He wore what looked like a black tunic. Hien smirked.  
  
"So you finally found me" Hien said. Kuwabara walked in front of the rest of them saying "I'll handle him." "You couldn't beat him when he was disguised as a kid" said Hiei, "So how do you expect to defeat him now." "You shut up, shorty" Kuwabara shouted. Kuwabara had energy form in his hands and grabbed it swinging two swords shouting "Spirit Sword Double", until he got hit by a blast from Hien that sent him through the wall into the kitchen. Keiko saw him, screamed, and ran out the door, cradling Poo in her arms as she pushed the little kids out. "You know, he might actually be able to do something in battle if he just shut up and attack" Hiei said coldly. "I never asked for your opinion, midget" Kuwabara managed to say as he limped back onto the battlefield.  
  
'Kuwabara" Kurama said, "You better let me take care of it." Kurama reached into his hair and pulled out, a beaten down rose that had nearly been cut in half and had the peddles plucked out. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Kurama screamed, "What happened to my rose?" "I told you I would get you Kurama" Hiei thought as he smiled. A flashback occurs back to when Hiei and Kurama were talking in the kitchen. As Kurama turned around to leave, Hiei used his speed to take the rose, stomp on it, pick the pedals off, bend it in half, and put it back in his hair. The scene returns to Kurama as he stares down at his rose. He throws it down, and starts to look for something that will act like a whip. He looks outside and sees some weeds in the garden next door. "Those will work" he thinks as he runs outside to the yard, picks them, and runs back.  
  
"WEED WHIP" Kurama shouts as the weeds grow longer, and fuse into one whip. "Damn, I hadn't counted on this" Hiei thought as he saw the new whip. Kurama looks at the whip and says "Not as long or as strong, but it should be enough." Kurama swings the whip at Hien, but he simply jumps out of the way. Kurama takes another swing while Hien is in the air, but Hien jumps off the wall and kicks Kurama in the chest. Kurama is knocked back, but quickly recovers and swings his whip again. Hien ducks under the whip and shoots a blast of energy at Kurama. Kurama jumps over the shot and swings as fast as he can at Hien. Hien manages to avoid most of the swings, but is hit by the final three. Kurama hits the ground and swings straight at him.  
  
Furiously, Hien recovers, grabs the whip, and sends energy through it. Kurama screams as the energy surges through his body until he hits the ground.  
  
Destroying the whip with his energy, Hien slowly advances to Kurama. Kurama gets to his feet and throws a punch, but Hien catches it. Quickly, Hien throws Kurama over his shoulder. Hitting the ground, Kurama struggles to get up, but is kicked into the wall. Hien slowly advances to the unconscious Kurama. "YAAAAAAA". Hien turns to see who's voice is that, just in time to catch the spirit sword Kuwabara made. He struggles with all his might but is still pinned to the wall right next to Kurama. "Spirit Gun" Yuskue shouts as energy shoots out form his index finger. "No way are you getting me" Hien shouts as he absorbs Kuwabara sword, making Kuwabara lose his balance. Hien pushes Kuwabara into the shot. He screams as the shot hits him in the back, as it launches him into the wall and he lay there unconscious.  
  
"Kuwabara" Yuskue shouts as he stands there, an aura now surrounding him. Hiei steps in front of him, "I can take care of this." "Are you sure?" "Trust me" Hiei states as he walks toward Hien. Hiei closes his eyes as he begins to gain energy. An aura forms around him, blowing off his bandana as his Jagan eye opens. His shirt rips off as his skin turns green and eyes appear all over his skin. Hiei had reverted back into his full demon form. "Ready" Hiei said as he starred down Hien. Hien simply nodded. Quickly, Hiei ran up to him and tried to punch him, but Hien moved out of the way. He used his speed to get behind Hien and kick him in the back. Hien recovered and swung his fist at Hiei, but the demon dodged the attack and punched him multiple times in the chest. Hien crouched down and staggered back, but Hiei ran up to him and tackled him into the wall.  
  
Hien got up, smiling and said "Oh, I see. You're much stronger than the rest." Hiei said nothing as he starred at his prey. "What is there something on my face." Hiei still said nothing. "Fine. I know what will get you to stop starring at me" he shouted as he lifted his hands in the air and started to chant. Hiei ran up Hien and began to beat him senselessly, but still Hien kept up the chant. Suddenly, Hien knocked Hiei back, put his hands in front of him and shouted "Breath of the Dragon." A powerful burst of energy shot out form the palms of Hien and flew straight toward Hiei. Hiei was able to dodge the blast, but the explosion hit him and he fell to the floor. Now Hien put his hands to the side and began to chant.  
  
"Better stop him now before he does something else like that" Hiei thought as he got up and charged Hien again. This time however, Hien put his hands in front of him before Hiei reached him and shouted "Fist of the Locust." Multiple little energy burst sprang out from Hien's hands, aimed directly at Hiei. Hiei dodged all of the blasts and kicked Hien into the wall.  
  
"Your not so tough" Hiei began to say until something hit his back. He screamed in agony as more and more of the little blasts his back. Hien got up and said "Did I forget to mention that the Fist of the Locust technique hones in on the persons spirit energy and will follow you until it hits." Hiei hit the ground and quickly began to get up off the ground.  
  
Hien once again put his hands to his side as he began to chant. As soon as Hiei had gotten up, Hien screamed "Fist of the Locust" and the little blasts were after him again. Hiei ran towards the wall, little blasts following him. He jumped off of the wall and saw the shots go through it and then come back out. "What" he shouted. "Breath of the Dragon." Hiei turned in time to see the blast hit him and the little shots hit him in the back. He screamed in agony as he fell to the ground and stopped moving.  
  
"HIEI" Yuskue screamed as the aura came back around him. His aura grew even larger as he starred at the monster before him. "YOUR GONNA DIE" he screamed as he ran at Hien. His speed surprised Hien as he was able to kick him into the wall. "SPIRIT GUN" he yelled as a blast larger than the one before came at Hien. Hien tried to knock the blast away, but it was to large and he was hit by the attack, sending him through the wall.  
  
Hien got up off the ground slowly. "Now you pissed off" he said as he put his hands up in the air and chanted. "Well good for me" Yuskue said as he gathered energy onto his index finger. "Breath of the Dragon" Hien screamed as the shot the blast again. "Spirit Gun Double" Yuskue shouted as two shots of equal size shot out through his finger. The first one hit the blast and destroyed it, the second one went towards Hien. Hien jumped out of the way of the second blast, and landed near Hiei. He lifted Hiei up and he began to glow. "What are you doing to Hiei" Yuskue shouted. Hiei stopped glowing and was tossed to the side. Hien put out one of his hands and shouted "Duplication technique". Suddenly, a second Hiei was standing right in front of him. The fake Hiei opened his eyes and charged at Yuskue.  
  
Yuskue and Hiei were trading blow for blow equally with no signs of either giving up. Yuskue knocked Hiei back and the was knocked to the ground by another Hiei. Yuskue got up to see both Hieis starring at him. Quickly, both of them punched Yuskue in the side and a third one kicked him in the face. Yuskue started to get up until a forth one grabbed him and threw him towards Hien. Hien made a fifth one that knocked Yuskue away and made him hit the floor. Yuskue staggered up and spit blood onto the ground. The Hieis all started to charge at him. Yuskue gathered energy into his fist and threw a punch into the air. The punch launched multiple shots into the air as he yelled "Shotgun". The shots destroyed all of the Hieis and hit Hien in the chest. Hien hit the ground as Kuwabara, Kurama, and the real Hiei all regained consciousness.  
  
Hien got up and said "Fine. I'll take on all of you at once." Kurama charged him and threw a punch that Hien easily dodged. Then Kuwabara charged him with his sword, but again Hien dodged. Then Hien heard Hiei's voice shout "Dragon of the Darkness Flame". He turned to see a dark blast with the head of a dragon coming right at him. "Oh you think that will work" Hien said as he prepared to shoot at the dragon. "I DO" Yuskue shouted at the top of his lungs as he ran toward Hien.  
  
"SPIRIT WAVE" Yuskue yelled as he punched Hien in the face with a blast hitting him right after. Hien flew into the dragon and was instantly destroyed as was another wall. The house began to shake as the top was collapsing. "Not good" Yuskue said as they tried to run away, but it was to late and the house collapsed on them all.  
  
"So I take you all want your lives back" Koenma said as he saw three beaten warriors in front of his desk. "Where is Kurama" the toddler asked. They all looked to the corner of the room to see Kurama smoking. "Hey" Yuskue shouted, "How come you won't give me any of that"? "There was only enough of my weed whip to make one" Kurama replied. "Kurama, you do know your only smoking everyday garden weeds, not the weed, don't you" asked Koenma. Kurama looked at the floor, then looked at them, laughed like a maniac, and then continued smoking. "Well whatever, your all going to have to go through an ordeal to your lives back" he stated. "So what do we have to do, hatch more chicken eggs" Yuskue replied. "Ummmmm, no not exactly. You all have to be my slaves for a number of days." "What" they all shouted in unison. "Oh yea. Then get me something from Burger King or Jack in the Box. I don't care which" said Koenma. "No way" they all shouted. "Next, one of you has to massage my bunions" Koenma stated.  
  
"GET HIM" Yuskue shouted as they all jumped on Koenma's desk and started to beat him. "Wait, can't we come to a compromise" the toddler screamed. They stopped beating him, looked to each other, and then continued to beat on him. "OK, OK, you can get your lives back" he screamed. The boys stopped beating on him. "I'll bring one of you back, just pick up my dry cleaning and...." They all started to beat him up again. Fifteen minutes later, the boys had left, happy that they got there lives back. Ogre looked at the bruised Koenma. "Really sir, was all that necessary." "Yes Ogre, it was. I had to give it a try" Koenma stated. Botan rushed in through the door saying "The boys have made a full recovery." "Good job Botan, now go and pick up my dry cleaning, and after that maybe you could massage my back." Botan got her oar and smacked Koenma into the wall. "I'm taking my break" she shouted as she walked out the door. "Had to try" Koenma said before he passed out on the floor.  
  
A/n: Hope you liked it. Now I have a lot of works I want to do but I'm not sure which one to do. So, I'm gonna let you vote on it. Your choices are: G Gundam or Inuyasha. See Ya. 


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